Two weeks ago I wrote a blog about sexism. It made no attempt to offer my opinion in any way, but was intended to pose questions to the reader about themselves. Some misunderstood and thought it represented my views, others thought it was provocative. As I offered no explanations or caveats with the piece, I thought I would now give an opinion.

That said, it is just that; an opinion of someone who doesn’t claim to be the voice of the victims or the voice of men or the voice of anyone else.

I don’t know how it feels to be victimised for the colour of my skin because it has never happened to me. I don’t know how it feels to be insulted because I am obese, or ginger or religious, because I have never experienced any of those things. I don’t know how it feels to be a victim of sexism because it has never happened to me. Some might say I am very fortunate. I suspect I am. The only small oppressed minority group that I belong to (apart from being a lifelong Sheffield United fan), is literally that – I am shorter than most men.

Recently at work, I took part in a presentation where I had to speak at the front of the room before about 40 people. As I walked to the front of the room, someone shouted “can you stand on a chair so we can see you?” I didn’t hear anyone laugh or comment and I chose to simply ignore it. I did not feel victimised. I did not feel discriminated against nor did I feel offended. I paused and carried on with what I was doing and quickly forgot the comment. I only remembered the comment later, when someone said that the person who heckled was out of order. I said it wasn’t even funny or original. Rather than thinking that his comment was the action or attitude of everyone in the room, I believe that his outburst said more about him than me.

With that incident in mind I wonder if the assault on men as a whole in social media sites is appropriate. As a man, I am able to acknowledge that unfair treatment of any one person or group of people, because of their age, gender, ethnic origin, height, class, sexual preference or weight, is absolutely wrong, unacceptable  and has no place in modern society. Blaming the deplorable actions of a few on the entire male population is surely as bad as the acts themselves. Again, I feel the need to clarify that statement- and I am not suggesting that all women or feminists or people on twitter are guilty of this but I have read many comments aimed at sexist men that attacks all men and this is also unacceptable.

Now, to answer some of the questions I asked of the reader a fortnight go..

Firstly, it is wrong to judge a sportsman or sportswoman on her appearance as it is entirely irrelevant. Footballers should be judged on their football skills, runner’s on their running skills, teachers on their teaching ability, tennis players on their tennis. It is fair that those who put themselves up as role models are judged on their morals to a degree as well. If they are ugly or attractive has no bearing on their ability to do their job so should not be a factor in commentary. Men and women employed to provide a public service, such as those employed by the television companies should not be saying sensational stupid comments about any body’s looks. When they do say stupid offensive remarks they should expect to be punished, not merely issue an apology.

Since my original article, there has been an almighty storm which started on twitter. Following a female publicly campaigning to have more women on our money, she faced threats of rape and bombing on twitter. This is an absolute outrage and the people responsible should be jailed and banned from social media sites for life. I am all in favour of campaigning. I am all in favour of free speech. I am in favour of democracy. I disagree with most Tory policies and usually disagree with most Tory supporter’s views and tweets. I have never once had any inclination to threaten those people with violence, rape or bombing, and I have never said anything personally insulting to them. This isn’t because I am extraordinary; this is because I am a normal person. Normal fair human beings realise that everyone is individual and should be judged as such. Ignorant, narrow minded stupid bullies seek to influence others by bullying and harassing and making threats to others that challenge their beliefs. They can never be allowed to succeed.

The lack of women in boardrooms and top jobs is due to sexist ideas and systems that are undoubtedly outdated but never the less still exist. I asked is it because women have traditionally stayed at home and raised the kids. Yes, I believe that is the case and I believe that is down to sexist attitudes and behaviours. I also believe it needs to change and think of myself as fortunate to work for an employer with a majority of women managers. Despite a high number of female managers though there is still a heavy male dominance at the very top. If there is to be true fairness in the work place ( and life) then women need to be encouraged and enabled to get the top jobs. They should be empowered. The success of them will inspire the next generations and help them see that there is an alternative to staying home and raising the kids. Those that want a career should be able to compete for roles on a level playing field and judged on merit not gender.  Those who do want to stay at home and raise a family should not be criticized for that either though. I know from my own experience that staying at home looking after a house and children can be more testing and indeed exhausting than going to work- I know what I would rather do.. I do not pretend to have an answer to the boardroom problem, as I don’t think positive discrimination is fair either. There should not be all white, all black, all young or all anything shortlists. It is mind-set that needs to change and sadly I feel only hard work and time will change that.

Despite massive strides from the past we are still experiencing everyday racism, sexism, bigotry and ignorance that need to be highlighted and jumped upon. We all could give examples of this. It’s not all one way either. Would David Beckham be the most famous footballer on the planet if he hadn’t married a pop star and posed in his pants many, many times? I suspect not.

I also I feel we should be aware that things have got better and not believe the negative propaganda we read in our papers and see on our TV screens and social media site. We are not all bigots. We are not all anti-Muslim. We are not all racist. We are not all homophobic. We are not all sexist.